The face of autism:

This is probably not what you think of when you think of autism. My youngest son was diagnosed with autistic disorder at the age of two and my older son was diagnosed with PDD-NOS at the age of five. Autism is hard, but it isn't hopeless. This blog is dedicated to the two most amazing people I have ever met. Please use this blog as a resource and pass it along to families needing to know where to start.


Rise in Autism?

Is there really a huge increase in autism? Yes, but not as much as some would have you believe. There is an increase in moderate to severe autism cases. However, the 1 in 110 statistic is a bit misleading. Autism awareness is also at an all time high. That 1 in 110 stat also includes many children with Aspergers syndrome that in previous years did not receive a diagnosis. Aspergers has been around forever. They were previously known as "nerds". Everyone of us can think back to our childhood and remember 2 or 3 people we knew with terrible social skills but extremely smart in some areas. That statistic also includes children that now carry a dual diagnosis. Many children with Down's syndrome and other disabilities also fall under autism when looking at diagnostic criteria. As you can see, the statistic of 1 in 110 is misleading.

We can't solve problems by using the same

kind of thinking we used when we created them.

--Albert Einstein

Welcome!

Welcome to Puzzle Pieces. There will more information to come. I am currently building this site, so hold your horses and start with the Getting Started section.

Welcome!

Hopefully this site will help you and your family navigate through the challenges and joys of autism spectrum disorders. Enjoy!

Burying the Hatchet

This past fall, David and I were discussing the spring sports craze. Jesse was gearing up for baseball as early as January. He even discussed how he wouldn't be able to go to school in the spring because baseball was really important. David and I were discussing Tyler's interest in baseball, though both of us feared it would be a disaster and a waste of money. During our discussion, David mentioned that Tyler may never be able to play regular sports, but that we can investigate the possiblities in Special Olympics. My reactive response was some random large object chunked at my husband's head and a swift retreat to my bedroom to bawl my eyes out.

NO! Not my child! He is "delayed". He is autistic. He is brilliant. He is anything but DISABLED. That was something that I could not accept.

During a support group meeting, I met a young man named Grant that worked with Kyspin. Grant was in a wheel chair. Grant needed assistance in nearly every way. It was very difficult for him to even communicate. But he was truly BRILLIANT! His beautiful mind impacting me more than any of his areas of difficulty. His intelligence exceeded that of every other individual in the room. This person of great worth impacted me like no one else ever could. I will never be the same after meeting Grant.

The baseball season has started, and we gave Tyler his shot at sports. It has proven to be too much for him as he now claims after each practice, "Done Hotrods!!!" His attention span and maturity level is far below the other kids. None of the four year olds are exactly Babe Ruth, but Tyler avoids the group the entire time. We are ok with his decision.

I am finally ready to embrace his unique brilliance and his disabilities. In an attempt to finally bury the hatchet of disability denial, I am volunteering to work at the Special Olympics next Saturday. I will work, and we will cheer on the participants as a family. Have you ever seen the bumper sticker that says, "My kid beat up your honor student"? Well, I might make one that says, "My disabled kid just fired your baseball star." :) hehe

Continued...

When Tyler went to preschool, Jesse soaked up every ounce of my affection, attention and was thrilled to see Tyler when we picked him up. David and I discussed homeschooling Jesse because he had made a huge improvement. Last fall, we officially began homeschooling. Jesse soared academically. I realized that most of the therapy methods of teaching that I had learned with Tyler also worked great with Jesse. We used visual supports, rewards systems and lots of small short teaching sessions broken up with chores and motor activities. I knew that he still had his "quirks", a short attention span and listening comprehension problems, but I had patience and saw him soar when taught HIS way. Because we decided to homeschool, we started to make extra efforts to get Jesse into activities with other children and "socialize". This is when we noticed some social delays that concerned us both. I was also reading a book at the time that mentioned how some homeschooled boys grew up to resemble mama's boys and not the men we are trying to raise. Jesse bossed children around, sorted out disagreements out between younger children and acted as almost everyone's superior. My thought was, "OH no! He is turning into a MOTHER!" The author of that book was a well-known reformed author who was not against homeschooling by any means, but was noting a trend he saw with homeschooled boys. This led to an overnight (not quite thought out) decision to put Jesse into school. I communicated with his teacher often and informed her the best I could about Jesse. She immediately saw Jesse's differences when put in a class with peers the same age. The most notable difference was a language delay. He seemed confused often and needed constant assistance with his school work. We started the process of tests for Jesse. I really thought Jesse may have Aspergers syndrome. Aspergers is a high functioning form of autism. It is often associated with very intelligent individuals who struggle and fumble through the social world. This week, Jesse was diagnosed with PDD-NOS. This is also an autism spectrum disorder, but the children are not meeting ALL of the qualifications for an autism diagnosis. At the age of five, it is very hard to diagnose Aspergers because five year olds do not have many social expectations. His doctor did suggest that we reassess him age 8. That age will give a clearer picture on Jesse's level of fuctioning socially. Though Tyler's diagnosis shattered me, I have found comfort in this diagnosis. Jesse is who he is. This just EXPLAINS a lot. It also affects my atttitude toward his quirks. He isn't just a stubborn pain in the butt during Christmas gatherings, he is a kid with sensory issues and his language delays make it hard for him to voice his feelings. I love my son with all my heart and will do everything in my power to help him meet his potential--and he has a TON!

A New Course

When I started this blog, I dedicated it to Tyler and his journey through autism. Tyler's journey is now only a part of the story. He now has a partner in this race--Jesse. Jesse has always been a unique, amazing kid. He is BRILLIANT, and honestly the funniest kid I have ever met in my life. Though Jesse seemed to have a will of iron, he has given me the greatest joy a mom could know. When he was a toddler, we would sit in the floor for ages while I quizzed him on animals, their sounds, letters, and numbers (including spanish). The coolest thing was that Jesse seemed to thrive on learning new things. Jesse also loved to build. He would use every kind of block and even random objects. He would gather a stack of dishes, pile them on top of each other in these strange shapes and call it his rocket ship. He first worked the VCR at 12 months old. Jesse struggled with a slight language delay at two years old from ear infections, but ear tubes seemed to remedy the problem. Though Tyler had struggles even as an infant, Jesse still seemed to thrive and surpassed every developmental goal except for his slight speech delay. Our one struggle with Jesse was his will--a will of iron. There was no book or parenting method that would even come close to overtaking it. When he set his mind to something, it could easily turn into a 2+hour ordeal. As Tyler got older, Jesse also struggled with anxiety and large social gatherings. Holiday gatherings frequently turned into tantrum time. Though Jesse always had "quirks", he reached a real low point when Tyler was diagnosed with autism. The stress in the house affected Jesse in a very negative way. Therapists were constantly in and out of the house. Jesse obsessed about everything TYLER. He hid food and toys. He guarded his "stuff" from Tyler like a dog perched by his food bowl. Jesse packed loads of toys and trinkets everywhere he went and battled to keep his stuff with him all the time. He had developed some severe OCD tendencies that were making life very difficult. We were desperate to help him, but also very concerned for Tyler. We decided to put Jesse in therapy to help him sort through his anxieties and feelings. This really helped, but we saw the greatest improvement when Tyler started preschool. Jesse had time to get mom's full attention, and he thrived. TO BE CONTINUED......

Is It Spring Yet?

My children. Well, where do I start? I am a little behind on my countdown to spring this year. After the past 3 days, I have decided it is time to start the countdown.

Saturday: Jesse tied one end of my exercise band to his ankle and the other end to the top of my wicker bookshelf. He climbed atop a nearby chair and attempted a bungee jump. The result was my collection of lovely houseplants scattered across half the room. I still haven't gotten all of the dirt out of the carpet. Later that afternoon, I was in the bedroom folding clothes and heard a crashing noise coming from upstairs and ending downstairs. My first thought was, "Good grief. What now?" I continued folding and then heard a blood-curling scream coming from Tyler. I ran as fast as I could to the bottom of the stairway. Tyler was sitting in a laundry basket with a look of horror on his face. Jesse was getting ready for the shove down the stairs, when I screamed "No!" with all my might. The look of relief on Tyler's face was priceless. Jesse looked rather disappointed. This leads me to the conclusion that the first crashing noise was probably Jesse on a joy ride down the stairs.

Sunday: I took an afternoon nap and woke up to both of their bedrooms totally destroyed. This is actually pretty common. No big deal.

Later, the boys were fighting over a certain car. The toy was a rather heavy race car. I gave Jesse HIS car and gave Tyler the car they were fighting over (Jesse pushed Tyler and snatched it away). After I took the car from Jesse, he threw himself in the floor kicking and screaming. He then chunked his car at my head, barely missing, and made a rather large gash in the wall. Yes, I screamed. Then I, not so calmly, dragged him to his father to avoid child abuse. His punishment was a calm down time with daddy and losing tv for the evening and two more days.

Monday: Oh, little Tyler... I awoke this morning to the sound of running water. That is never a good sign. I crept upstairs to find Tyler dumping buckets of water down an air conditioner register. That one got a spanking.

Because of the aforementioned bedroom disasters, Tyler spent most of the day downstairs with me. I made him tag along as I cleaned downstairs, but he scrambled for things to get into twice when my phone rang and when I had to take the garbage to the road. When I came in the house, he squealed with delight as he ran to put toys in a hole he had made in a wall.

This evening, he came downstairs to tell me, "pee pee" as he grinned from ear to ear. Since there were no external signs of an accident, I asked Jesse why Tyler was saying "pee pee." Jesse nonchalantly says, "Tyler peed in the toybox." ARGHHhhhh!

His cute creation of the day was a drumset, drumsticks and microphone (wicker side table and three screwdrivers).

SO! I think it is time to say only 41 MORE DAYS 'til spring!!!!

On with the new

"Shoes on!"

Tyler has made amazing progress the past few months. We have been able to ease up on his diet a little bit and go back to a gluten free/casein free diet. This is a huge blessing since we have been getting him into more social situations. Americans+food=socializing.

We also made some changes in school a few months ago. He is now attending afternoon preschool. This is one of the best decisions we ever made. Tyler is the only resource kid in the afternoon session. His resource teacher is amazing. I feel confindent that all of his needs are being met every day, and he is flourishing. He is beginning to learn to interact with his new friends. We are planning on adding some new goals for his IEP that focus on his social skills. I also have plenty of time to do ABA with him in the morning.

We are also working on self help skills. Tyler has been able to dress himself for quite a while, but he gets lost in the process. I have been spending a lot of time on the computer making visual aides for these skills. He has become a bit fixated on his "shoes on" chart.